Copacabana

"Revenge is for chumps." ~ Henry Gondorff

This issue of character keeps coming up lately so I thought I better address it before the universe slaps me down for not paying attention. It's a concept that was drilled into me as a child and, who am I kidding, well into my adulthood to the present day by my parents. They thought of character as the thing that defines a person and dictates the decisions they'll make and their method for handling both success and failure. It's a hard concept -- and one I battled as a child when I would promise someone to do something and then try to back out of and my parents would remind me that failure to live up to promises is a bad character flaw. And that look of disappointment was just too much man. So I followed through on whatever thing it was I had promised but found distasteful. And, funny thing, it always turned out enjoyable on some level. Funny how putting your own needs aside tends to actually be fulfilling...

Anyway, I came across this nifty quote in the book I'm currently reading, Anthony Bourdain's Kitchen Confidential, the other night:

"Bigfoot [Bourdain's early mentor in the restaurant underworld] understood -- as I came to understand -- that character is far more important than skills or employment history...He understood, and taught me, that a guy who shows up every day on time, never calls in sick and does what he said he was going to do is less likely to fuck you in the end than a guy who has an incredible resume but is less than reliable about arrival time. Skills can be taught. Character you either have or don't have. Bigfoot understood there are two types of people in the world: those who do what they say they're going to do -- and everyone else."

I only mention this because of all the talk of associations -- in the larger (ahem, political) sphere and, frankly, in my own small, microcosmic world. The issue of associations, and guilt by, has been cropping up a lot lately for this kid. Pretty uncomfortably so in fact.

Charles Krauthammer's column today [you may have to register but it's worth it...] help put the world sphere in perspective. Just trying to work out what to do about the microcosm...I'm inclined to say that I understand how hard it is to swim against the stream. I've cried many times because I was forced to recognize character as important despite the fact that there are times in my life where everyone else is saying it's not and to just shut up about it and get on board. I get how painful it is.

But the truth is all I can do, like my parents, is be disappointed that you're not learning. Can't make you understand.

Be good to yourself this weekend.

**My apologies to Nate, who lent me the book, for using it to prop up my political ideology when, I suspect, you don't share my opinion. It's a fantastic book though so thanks for the loan.

posted by Lola @ 3:57 PM