Copacabana

It would help if you could help

Okay look, I can appreciate that you feel sorry for him. I'm sure seeing me all the time makes him feel like a schmuck -- but you know, you tend to feel the way you act and karma is a bitch. I could drop the details of the schmukyness but that doesn't really benefit anyone and it's all in the past. Things worked out as they should.

But let's get something straight: it's not pleasant for me either. The reminder of getting treated like that -- and being too big a wuss to actually stand up and crack some metaphorical skulls -- is something that I could definitely live without. But I've worked really hard to better my situation so I can, at last, be really free. And I'm working on not being a big wuss anymore, too. I've spent a couple years plugging away with that goal in mind. And I'm frustrated by the waiting for the harvest, even though I can almost see it -- it's been off in the distance for a while, peeking over the horizon and I want it to get here more than you. Trust that if nothing else.

So please, please, can you stop using the situation as your own personal amusing diversion and just let me get some decent work done? Since you don't seem to care how that will benefit me, think of how it will benefit him. No more reminder, no more guilt. And you can feel good knowing that you helped make a difficult situation easier, not harder. That pillow at night is a lot softer when you feel good about your day. I'm hopeful you'll end up being reasonable. But, in the event you just can't do the right thing, know this: you, like the rest of this nonsense, will be survived. It's just how I roll.

Zimmer hooked me up with some new music. Russian punk rock lets me bitch slap my demons (see above). Here's a video of one of their songs that went somewhat mainstream on, I think, a Target commercial.

posted by Lola @ 11:57 AM